Category Archives: Healing

Jesus took a cancer bullet for me

I have been very hesitant posting this as I assist many believers around the world who suffer with hypochondria. But I do believe it is a subject the Lord wants more people to know about. This has been a lesson to me to learn to take more care of my body. God values our bodies as it houses the precious Holy Spirit, so we should honour it (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

A year ago I was diagnosed with precancerous cells on my cervix. I almost fell apart from fear. I was only 2 stages away from cancer.
I prayed hard for an answer and God led me to following a plant based diet. By His grace He led me to Chris Wark’s website, a Christian guy who cured his stage 3 cancer by following a plant based diet. I did not receive any advice from my doctor, this was all God-led.
So you know, I wasn’t the healthiest eater. I kind of went off meat after I had my daughter and my meals have always consisted of mostly vegetables, chicken or fish. However, wolfing down processed foods was more often than it should have been. Sodas, tons of coffee, sugar and all sorts of horrible junk poisoned my body. These are terrible pollutants to our bodies, as the Lord has shown me.
I am convinced this is linked to the vision I had a few years back of unhealthy, gluttonous eating.

I cut out coffee because even though studies have not really proved it causes cancer it looked to me that it was messing with my endocrine system which eventually leads to cervical cancer. I allowed myself a cup of decaf on the weekends. Winter without coffee is hard. Hot chocolate I made from a plant based milk with raw cacao.

I also cut out sugar and switched to xylitol. My sugar mostly came from fruit. I stayed far away from processed foods and started growing my own vegetables.
No alcohol. No sweets. No meat. If it didn’t come off a tree or out of the ground I stayed away from it as far as possible.
I drank a lot of water with lemon. Lemon is alkaline in our bodies. Cancer adores an acid system. Our bodies want and need to be mostly alkaline and fruit and veggies ensure that. Meat, coffee and processed foods are very acid, and cancer feeds off it.
I ate tons of fruit and veggies that are high in antioxidants like berries and made a concerted effort to eat the fruit seeds as well, which contain compounds that help kill cancer cells.
Women with the condition I had are found to be lacking in selenium, folate, vitamin B and most cancer patients lack plenty of vitamin C as well.

So, I juiced the following and drank it every morning:
-Dark leafy greens, like kale and swiss chard/spinach for vitamin B
-Beetroot for the folate
-Apples and carrots for the vitamin C and to add some sweetness. I drank this with chia seeds that carry a lot of antioxidants that’s needed to quench cancer cells.
-Nuts (selenium) and avocado every day- healthy fats are essential, not fattening!
I supplemented my daily diet with the following tablets:
-Vitamin B complex
-3000mg vitamin C (yes, 3000!)
-I3Complex (Indole-3-Carbinol) which is a cell mutator protector, off the shelves from Solal.

I had a biopsy done towards end of November and my condition is gone, I’m all clear! It went within 5 months!
There’s more to plant based diets than people think.
To God the glory, for His mercy in saving me from disaster and teaching me something new!
And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.” Genesis 1:29
Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” Matt 6:26

When God steps in

One of my dear friends fell into a diabetic coma last month. Her family rushed all the way to South Africa from the UK to be at her bedside. She had always told us that she was on medical aid/insurance, but the private hospital she was rushed to could not locate any details that this was the case.

So there was this worry that they would have to move her to a government (state) hospital. In South Africa, that’s a no go! You want private medical care here. But because they were battling to stabilize her, they kept her in the private hospital. The first day’s costs were a cool fifty thousand Rand!
A week went by and she woke up but not getting that much better that they could move her.

My friend was saved but her mother and the rest of her family are not. The last thing you want to worry about when your child is in ICU are bills. We said only one prayer that God would assist with the bills somehow. One. We kept praying for my friend and her family that God would show up in a wonderful way so that they could see the King she was serving.

Unfortunately, two weeks later, God had decided to rather take my friend home to be with Him. But that doesn’t mean there was no miracle. He did show up.

My friend’s mother got to a point where she was starting to worry about the increasing bills, as they had warned it would cost in the region of over a million once my friend had recuperated! So she caught the Doctor in the hospital parking lot asking him about the ICU bill as she wanted to start making plans to ensure they could pay it.
He told her that any cent after the deposit she put down would not be charged to her. The rest of the treatment was absolutely free! How miraculous was that! She acknowledged that this was definitely a move of God, all glory to Him!
The way I see it is that He kindly gave us 2 more weeks with her to say our goodbyes – and we didn’t even have to pay for the privilege of it.

How God spent Friday night

Friday night was the horrors. I am very against giving dogs bones to eat. When I was a student I worked at a vet on weekends (surprised?) and a woman had given her Poodle a bone as a treat and it sliced his oesophagus all the way down! This is why I am so against dogs eating bones and I’m always warning people to not give their dogs any!
Lo and behold. What did I do after having a braai (BBQ) on Friday? I gave each of my three dogs a rib bone. As I sit here I still cannot understand why I did that! How stupid do you get? I think because the bone was very flat and smooth I thought they would safely enjoy the treat. I was wrong!

I stood outside to keep an eye on them when all of a sudden my little dog, Maxine, (who we rescued from abusers) yelped in pain and twisted her neck in a way that indicated this bone was stuck! To say I was horrendously horrified is an understatement. It was stuck alright – so badly that she could not look to her left and would walk skew! I shoved my finger down her throat in the hopes of feeling it but to no avail. Worse, it was late and all the vets were closed!
I would love to be able to tell you that I never wavered and was confident that God would help. No, I completely freaked – so much so that I became dizzy for a sec! You’re going to laugh but I placed my hand on her throat and took authority over the bone in Jesus name and commanded it to not cause any damage to Maxi, to smooth itself out and leave her body without harm.

Maxi bone incident

I made her bed next to mine for the night, fell flat on my face and prayed really earnestly for an hour. The gist went something along the lines of,
“Father, forgive me for what I have done to Your dog, who You have entrusted into my care. Forgive me for being a hypocrite in warning others but I did it myself. In Your mercy please reverse my stupid mistake. Look what I’ve done to her! I know I don’t deserve mercy right now but I know I can ask You because You are a good God. Lord, You know I will never be able to live with myself should something happen to her! Your word says that You raise up those who are bowed down (Psalm 145:14). You don’t even have to raise me up, please raise up Maxi in my place, she has been through so much (as you can see I was pretty desperate). Father I pray that You fix this for me and heal her. However, I do know this is a difficult and trying situation, and maybe it’s something You want me to mature from. To be honest with You this is not a test I want, but, Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven. To You Lord, Who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all I ask or think, be the glory (Eph 3:20). Blessed be Your name. Amen.”

I only slept for about 2 hours Friday night, as every time Maxi moved, she would cry in pain and I would wake up, and pray some more.  I was not in any way confident, I felt sick.
I rushed her to the vet as soon as it opened Saturday morning. I had to drop her off and they promised to call me with results. An hour later I got a call telling me to come fetch Maxi because there is nothing wrong with her according to the xray. I charged over.

The vet said to me, “Are you sure she swallowed a bone?”

“Yes! I was standing right next to her from the moment I gave it to her and saw it happen! It was about 12cm long.”

“Well, look here”, she said pointing to the xray. “There is no bone throughout her body. You can clearly identify bones in an xray by how white they are, just like her spine as you can see. There is not even a bone in her digestive system. I don’t understand. She can even turn her neck properly now.” And she could!

I was astounded! I rejoiced! My husband happily said, “Hah! God removed the bone!”
Maxi was perfect, as if nothing had even happened. What a miracle! I just witnessed a miracle! Talk about lovingkindness and tender mercies (Ps 103:4)! Praise You Jesus!

“So, God, how did You spend Your Friday night?”

“Oh, you know, the usual – performed a miracle here and there.”


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It always astounds me how God shows His beauty and sweetness in difficult times. This particular story showed me how He was not concerned as I was about this problem, but that He is so in control on that throne, that entertaining my baby was more of a priority to Him instead.

When my baby was 8 months old she developed a bad middle ear infection, which resulted in loads of crying, fevers, unwillingness to eat and obviously a lot of pain.
The first course of antibiotics never cleared the infection up, which the Doctors were puzzled about as it was a strong course.
So off we started on the second lot and I really prayed for a healing from God as I did not want to resort to grommets!

Everyday throughout the day, during work and whatever I was doing, I would silently pray for healing for my little one. One verse from Malachi 4:2 I find particularly beautiful is “…the Sun of Righteousness shall arise with healing in His wings…” and I always included it in my prayers. It really conjures up a beautiful picture in my head!

So, the one day, while playing with Jordan, she kept looking past me, upwards and laughing and smiling. When I looked to what she was focusing on, there was nothing there, just a blank wall! I remember thinking, ‘freaky’, but she obviously found something amusing. And I forgot about it.

That night, I had a dream. An angel came to me and said, “Jordan was laughing and smiling because Jesus was showing her what the wings look like!”

Isn’t that most beautiful? Here I was constantly worrying about an ear infection yet God was not the least bit concerned because He had it all under control – His Son did it all! He instead found joy in playing with Jordan! Hallelujah!

How I pray that I can model Christ in this way – to completely leave my troubles and burdens at His feet, and just be free to enjoy Christ for all He is. What a way to get through life’s troubles! While we sit and worry, He relaxes on His throne – we can find joy in His presence instead!
God has it all under control. Lets’ enjoy Him always!

Amen Jesus – thank You for my sweet memories!

Condemning tongues

I have mentioned before how my daughter was born with TOFS. During my pregnancy and her surgery, it took a lot of strength to stay strong in the Lord and not get swept away by fear.

The best surgeon in the country had operated on her – he was over 6 feet tall and had massive hands, I was astounded how he managed to work on such tiny little humans. He operated between her third and fourth ribs too! I had prayed that Jesus do the operation Himself and that He used the Doctors to assist in the op. I take “not looking to man but Jesus” very seriously.
After the operation the surgeon came to me and said that it was quite a tight operation and he really had to pull tissue to ensure closure. His words were, “I’m not actually sure if this is going to take. We will only be able to tell in 2 weeks’ time. She will need to be transferred to Red Cross Childrens’ hospital in Cape Town if this does not take.”

Fear almost got the better of me but I know the serious consequences of accepting something that does not line up with God’s Word or counteracts my faith for what I had been praying for. I had prayed for three hours before the op and for three hours during the op, and that Jesus do the op Himself. There are no mistakes with Jesus. I truly believed that He did a perfect work, and always has. 

As soon as the surgeon left my hospital room, I came against all negative words spoken by him, and rejected them in the name of Jesus. Every tongue that rises against me in judgment I will condemn! (Isaiah 54:17). I pleaded the blood of Jesus over my daughter and her operation and proclaimed the truth of Jesus’ perfect work.

A year later we moved back to Johannesburg. TOFS kids are prone to having food getting stuck in their throat at the site of the operation, due to a narrowing, which then requires dilation whereby the child is anesthetized and a scope is put down the throat while the paediatric surgeon removes the piece of food lodging the throat. A chick pea got stuck in Jordan’s throat, which I should have mashed up. But this turned out for God’s glory to prove to me and my family how beautiful His handiwork is.

When Jordan came out of the dilation, the paediatric surgeon said to me that it all went well and asked, “who operated on her oesophagus? Out of all my years as a surgeon, the operation on her oesophagus is the most perfect and beautiful work I have ever seen done.” 


Awesome and wonderful handiwork. There was a shift from doubt to perfection.
I don’t like to accept the negative prognoses and diagnoses from doctors. Doctors are a wonderful blessing from God. They have a degree (and a thousand times more clever than me!) but we are in the world but not of it (John 15:19) and serve a God that reigns on a throne! Declare the wonderful works of the Lord instead! (Psalm 118:17)



Proclaim the Name!

The one thing I don’t get is healing. I just don’t. And to be honest it has left me very frustrated. However, I have never had a problem in praying for healing over my animals – it always comes speedily. Why is that? Because they are sinless? Not sure. Yet I struggle so often praying for healing for my toddler who suffers from allergies and respiratory infections. All. The. Time. And the way someone gets healed does not necessarily work the same for the next person.

At the end of June I was booked off for a week for what my Doctor suspected was either swine flu or one of two of the bad flu strains going around. So I was put on swine flu meds in case. The symptoms were awful and I have never experienced such intense body pain before.

Yesterday at 4am I woke up feeling nauseous with stomach cramps. It came out of nowhere. I had not eaten anything strange. I had a major strategy meeting yesterday so I initially put it down to nerves, which was not the case. I could no way miss this meeting. So I did everything I thought of – I commanded any spirits of infirmity to leave me, I came against the sickness in Jesus name, I cast it out my body, but it got progressively worse. The body chills started which led to body pain. I kept running to the bathroom wanting to throw up. I prayed throughout the day for my healing because I did not want to take more time off work! By the time I got home, all I could do was lie in bed and literally cry like a baby from the pain. I could not get up because my dizziness was so severe I kept falling all over the place.

As I lay in bed in tears, it got to the point of me now begging God for healing. “Please Lord, I don’t even know what to pray anymore!”
Suddenly and as clear as day the words “JESUS IS LORD” flashed in my mind. I just went with it. As loudly as I could muster, halfway into my pillow, I declared, “Jesus is Lord… Jesus is Lord…sickness-Jesus is Lord, so get away from me.”

Within twenty minutes I was as right as rain! The dizziness and fever went away and so did the body pain! I was able to eat something for the first time that day. And I had sweet sleep (Proverbs 3:24). It was as if I could feel the illness dissolve.

“That if you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved.” Romans 10:9
Christ is in the promise! Declaring that Jesus is Lord is a proper manifestation of faith. Proclaiming Christ’s name was an early profession of faith, still is, and is an end time reality. Proclaiming His name over my illness is what drove it away.

“ Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Phil 2:9-10

The highly exalted name given is ‘Lord’ and echoes Christ’s divinity. The Blue Letter Bible describes Lord as:
-he to whom a person or thing belongs, about which he has power of deciding; master, lord
-the possessor and disposer of a thing

I belong to the Lord and He disposed my immediate healing. No fancy prayer was needed, which I was doing all day long. Just a proclamation of His name!

Thank You, Lord, that I belong to You and that You have power over my life and everything else. 

The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe. Proverbs 18:10

Jesus said WHAT?!

When I was much younger and first read the story in Matthew where Jesus refers to a Canaanite woman as a dog, I was horrified. I read it over several times and was rather shocked that our loving Lord had resorted to insulting someone! I actually pictured myself being told that by Christ and it just did not make sense. I just can’t picture insults flying from His mouth.
So I decided to dig a little.

The scene in Matthew 15 opens with Jesus entering the Gentile area of Tyre and Sidon. A Canaanite woman desperately came up to him begging him to heal her daughter who was demon possessed. The conversation went like this:
She said, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David! My daughter is severely demon-possessed.”
But He answered her not a word. And His disciples came and urged Him, saying, “Send her away, for she cries out after us.”
But he answered and said, “I was not sent except to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.”
Then she came and worshiped him, saying, “Lord, help me!”

But he answered and said, “It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs.
And she said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs eat the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table.”
Then Jesus answered and said to her, “O woman, great is your faith! Let it be to you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed from that very hour.

Only the Jews called Jesus the Son of David – was she pretending by calling him the Son of David to obtain healing or did she really believe he was the Son of David? Surely or why waste your time asking? She truly acknowledged that he was the Jewish King. First sign of faith.

Also, we are all aware that the Greek word for dog in that passage is “kynarion” which means puppy or little dog. So the harshness is softened somewhat.
So was it really an insult? She does not seem to be quite phased by this supposed insult, like we are, does she? Instead she pretty much agrees with Jesus by replying, “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs eat the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table.” Was she so desperate for her daughter’s healing that she just agreed with Jesus to persuade him to heal her daughter? No. She just called him Master in an indirect way! Second sign of faith.

Surprisingly, the more I meditated on this passage, the less shock value I got from the dog statement and became more aware of what was actually going on behind the scenes here. Jesus is brilliant!

Looking at the context of Canaan at that time, it was evil and child sacrifices were in full swing. It was no secret to anyone the filth they were running on. No wonder the Jews commonly referred to the Gentiles as dogs – but I see Jesus’ soft side here. The sins of Canaan were contemptible but, to me, the fact that he chose to use the diminutive word of puppies, and not wild dogs, indicated his love for her still. Who does not love a pup? We are all his pups, are we not? None of us are without sin, but he handles us gently, with love and endearment.
This woman seemed to have agreed with Jesus on the sins of Canaan by agreeing with his statement. She acknowledged them, took ownership of them. Yet, still believed that he would heal her daughter despite shortcomings.

We see that Jesus initially ignored her request, “But He answered her not a word.” (v23). Seems rude? I don’t think so. I have heard other Christians say before “Oh, some Christians just can’t handle that Jesus WAS probably being rude and insulting!” Well, yes, that’s me. I can’t accept it. Because that’s sin. Jesus was sinless (1 Peter 2:22). What would cause someone to blatantly ignore another- only sinful feelings cause that type of behaviour – arrogance, irritation, pride.

I think Jesus wanted to teach the disciples a lesson, so we could draw from it. 
Picture Jesus – walking, disciples behind him, him seemingly ignoring her desperate request, but instead knowingly waiting for the disciples to say just exactly what he wants everyone to hear- the disciples were openly irritated by this woman by telling Jesus to get rid of her, “Send her away, for she cries out after us.” (v23).
The verse after that starts with the word “but”. “But he answered and said, ‘I was not sent except to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.’” Instead of sending her away he explains himself to her. Why? Waiting to expose the thoughts and religion of the hearts of people who rejected not only him, but everyone who did not fall into their circle. I think he wanted them to complain out loud.

He made it clear that his purpose was to first focus on salvation for the Jews (v24). So the benefits of the covenant with the Jews were not available to this Canaanite woman. The kingdom was offered to the Jews. The children need to be fed at the table first.

But her response seems what Jesus was looking for: “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs eat the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table.” He replies saying, “O woman, great is your faith! Let it be to you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed from that very hour’ (v28).
How did she get her answer so quickly? And so joyously at that! Jesus responded excitedly, “O woman!” Because she knew that even though she was not entitled to full kingdom benefits, the benefit of just believing on Jesus for mercy, as small as a crumb, was enough to heal her daughter! Jesus loved that! Here he was trying to get Israel to believe he was indeed the Messiah, but they kept challenging him for a sign. Yet, here was this Gentile woman who knew without a doubt who he really was and what he could do. She could see what the Jews could not! His astounding grace and mercy. She may have come from a place of sin, yet her heart could see passed all the rules and laws and she clearly saw Jesus as the royalty he is. She knew how to approach his throne of grace! He loved how she believed in him even though she knew his mission was to Israel first.

Maybe I am way off, but what I see here is that Jesus kept this conversation going because he wanted to show the disciples, Pharisees and Teachers of the Law, and us, this kind of faith. That, yes, we are all sinful, but we may boldly approach the throne of grace.
A little prophetic too, isn’t it? A great moment appearing to be insulting, yet showing how Jesus was to eventually bring salvation to the entire world.

May we never be prevented from approaching our Jesus because “we may not be good enough.” How much more available to us who are his children? Approach him boldly and let it be to you as you desire!




THAT oil??

I have a bottle of oil I keep in my handbag and one in my bedroom cupboard for anointing purposes. I have on one time, though, grabbed car oil out of desperation! It is only a symbol after all.
However, I’m sure this remains quite a mystery to small kiddies.
My daughter was having a much-loved sleepover ritual at granny and grandpa one weekend when she fell quite sick with a fever.

My mom grabbed some olive oil in her kitchen to anoint her and pray over her. 
When she walked into the bedroom where Jordan lay, Jordan exclaimed with a shocked look, “Nana! is THAT the oil you cook with??”

Standing in the gap

Standing in the gap intrigues me – it is an awesome revelation of God’s will for us to extend grace and help to others in times of need. The dictionary defines standing in the gap as “to expose one’s self for the protection of something; to make defense against any assailing danger; to take the place of a fallen defender or supporter”. Satan will try look for any vulnerability to prey on, so standing in a person’s gap by praying and interceding helps lift them up out of that vulnerability.

The most remarkable story on standing in the gap was from one of my favourite Christian authors. She had a patient in hospital who was suffering from excruciating back pain and increasing his medication dose would not have been wise due to the dose he was already on. Her compassion made her pray to God and asked if she could stand in the gap for him so that he could have some relief in his back. She forgot about the prayer. The following day, as she stood up from her chair, she pulled her back out. In her agony she asked the Lord, “Lord, what just happened to my back?” He responded, “You asked Me to allow you to stand in the gap for your patient. This is it.” And He showed her Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” In addition to prayer, God allowed her to take on some of the pain so that her patient would experience some relief and his healing could come quicker! She still stressed the importance of not accepting the illness but praying against it while standing in the gap. Intercede is from the Latin word ‘to come between.’ So as you intercede, you are standing between God and man and intervening by praying. Ezekiel 22:30 said that God actively looks throughout the earth for those who will stand in the gap. We are not to demand from God that you stand in the gap this way, but to ask if it is His will first.

Looking at Exodus 4:24-26, we see how the Lord was about to kill Moses. However, Zipporah interceded for Moses by circumcising their son and touching Moses’ feet with the blood saying, “Surely you are a husband of blood to me!” And the Lord let him go.

My daughter suffers from allergies. The wind just blows and she gets runny noses and coughs. As she is a TOFS child, they are prone to be chesty kids, so any allergy she gets runs the risk of turning into a respiratory chest infection, which then runs the risk of hospitalisation! This happens on a monthly basis. It is excruciatingly worrying to see so much medication passing through that tiny little body.

I have never suffered from allergies in my entire life.
In March I prayed and asked the Lord for mercy – to allow me stand in the gap for Jordan that I may take on some of her illness and allergy attacks to lessen the burden on her body and so that it would not develop into a chest infection, if it was His will. I left it in His hands.
I kid you not – since March I have developed strong allergies that have turned into chest infections twice! Jordan on the other hand, has only had a slight runny nose and small cough. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
During this time of affliction, I have prayed against the illnesses and taken authority over them in Jesus name, refusing to accept them in my body. I have also taken communion during this time for Jordan’s healing.
Does this not fit in with the dictionary definition above of to take the place of a fallen defender; exposing myself for the protection of something; defending her against danger?

For mercy triumphs over judgment, does it not? (James 2:13). Jesus Christ’s sacrifice for us shows us clearly that He places the value of mercy over judgment.

Dear Reader, do you think this is something you will ask the Holy Spirit for direction on, to use for your family and friends?

How Jesus cleared my hypochondria (depression) in 4 days!

It was 1997 and I had just started University. I don’t like change, never have. So when my school boyfriend of one year broke up with me (cuz it’s all very serious when you’re young you know!) and the comfort and familiarity of my school and friends as well as the classes changed dramatically, depression hit. I was crying throughout the entire night, sleeping for an hour, not eating. I cried during the day. I was just so so sad and depressed.

Somewhere along the line, things got worse. I developed full-blown hypochondria! (Now known as somatic symptom disorder or illness anxiety disorder). I was convinced I had every sickness known to man. A cough meant cancer of the lungs, a headache meant brain tumour, a simple earache meant I was going deaf, you name it. I was a virgin and did not even know what drugs looked like, but after watching Tom Hanks in Philadelphia, yes, I now convinced myself I had AIDS. LOL! I laugh about it now, but at the time it was torture. I was driving myself mad. As soon as you have a minor little ache or pain, out comes the encyclopaedia or Google, and the more you read, the more illnesses you’re convinced you have!  I was born with a cute little birth mark on the back of my neck that looks like a little paw print, and one day when someone commented on it, I decided that the birth mark I knew about for 17 years was now all of a sudden some form of spinal cancer and I would start crying. My family thought this was hilarious and looking back I can laugh, but at the time I was going through sheer mental hell. I never wanted them to know that I was convinced all this was real. Out of all the diseases I had this fear of cancer and every symptom meant I had the dreaded disease. It was so bad that my body ached with short sharp pains the whole day through. Obviously this was my mind’s way of getting off of the break up and drastic change in circumstances, but it was torment nonetheless. A lot of worry, anxiety and major depression. I was convinced that I could take a nurse’s exam and totally pass. That’s how much reading into illnesses and treatment I had done!

One day while waiting for a class to start, I stood up as all the students started going into the lecture hall and I got a bad dizzy spell. I have always had low blood pressure and that has always been common for me, but of course this meant I had a brain tumour. At this point this had been going on for nine months and I had actually had enough of this torment and decided to skip the class and go to the Library – but to read again! But this time it was different. I found a book on aches and pains and decided to go sit at one of the desks and read it as there were no students at the time and it was nice and quiet. As I was approaching one of the desks about to sit down, something told me, for no reason, to go sit at the desk opposite it. As I sat down I looked on the table and someone had engraved “God loves you” into the wood. Something so simple, yet I was flooded with peace. I still had the nerve to read the book and I think I now have a degree graduate level of pains in the body! But when I went home I was so much ‘lighter’, I felt better, more positive.

At the time I was reading a book on one of my favourite authors of all time. She was writing about one of her spiritual warfare encounters that had just gotten too overwhelming and she said that all she had managed to say to God at that exhausting time was “God, this is Your battle, not mine. Thank You for fighting it for me.” That sat so well in my Spirit and I decided then and there that I was going to proclaim that every morning when I woke up until this issue of mine had vanished. As my feet touched the ground I said aloud, “God, this is Your battle, not mine. Thank You for fighting it for me.” I could feel myself getting better each morning and four days later it was gone! Just gone! The pains in my body were gone as well as the tormenting thoughts about my health. I did have to watch them as they still tried to penetrate my mind a few days after that, but I learnt various verses of scripture by heart and would quickly recite them every time they tried coming back. But I was free.
It reminds me of one of my favourite events in the Bible – the battle of Jehoshaphat in 2 Chronicles 20. People had come to him and told him that a vast number of enemies were coming against him, “A great multitude is coming against you from beyond the sea, from Syria; and they are in Hazazon Tamar”  Jehoshaphat freaked and the Spirit of the Lord came upon Jahaziel and said, “Hearken you, all Judah, and you inhabitants of Jerusalem, and you king Jehoshaphat, thus says the LORD unto you, be not afraid nor dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours, but God’s 2 Chronicles 20:15
After fasting, all they had to do was just stand, and God fought, and won, the battle for them!

I’m not saying that depression and anxiety, or any mental disorder for that matter, can be cured in four days, because it is not time that cures you, but the blood of Jesus that was shed on the cross. I was young, and at that stage I wasn’t as clued up about spiritual warfare or strongholds and authority as I am today. Jesus took the little faith that I had and used it to accomplish a great thing! I wanted to post this because I want people to see that Jesus still heals today – as hard as it feels to overcome the mountain you’re looking at, just. press. on. Proclaim that faith out loud, the devil hates it! Glory be to God! Nothing is too much for Him! How he helped me was painless, free, peaceful, merciful and most of all, gentle. Lean on Him, and He will help you! Be free of your bondage in Jesus’ mighty name! Only He can do it.

You can also check out my other blog that focuses on hypochondria and anxiety